Thursday 5 December 2013: How will it be?
Any windy forecast reminds me of this bit of 1961, Beyond the Fringe, sketch.
And will there be a mighty wind, Brother Enim?
Certainly there will be a mighty wind, if the word of God is anything to go by...
And will this wind be so mighty as to lay low the mountains of the earth?
No - it will not be quite as mighty as that - that is why we have come up on the mountain, you stupid nit - to be safe from it. Up here on the mountain we shall be safe - safe as houses.
And what will happen to the houses?
Well, naturally, the houses will be swept away and the tents of the ungodly with them, and they will all be consuméd by the power of the heavens and on earth - and serve them right!
And shall we be consumed?
Con..sum..éd? No, we shall not be consuméd - we shall be up on the mountain here, you see, while millions burn, having a bit of a giggle.
When will it be, this end of which you have spoken?
Aye, when will it be - when will it be?
In about thirty seconds time, according to the ancient pyramidic scrolls... and my Ingersoll watch.