so little ointment, so many flies...

Three months previously...

wingpig: Hello shop. If {condition1} = True then what does y equal?
camera renting-shop: Y equals True.
wingpig: Splendid. If {condition2} = True then what does y equal?
c r-s: Y equals True again.
wingpig: Super. Finally, if {condition3} is true then what is y?
c r-s: Y would be True.
wingpig: Marvellous.

One day later...
thefuturemrswingpig: Hello shop. I believe you have already spoken to wingpig. Can I check that if any of conditions 1 to 3 are true that Y will then be True?
c r-s: Indeed. We said that, we did. Confirmed.

Earlier today...

wingpig: Hello again, shop. Can I ask that if {condition3} = True, what is the value of Y?
c r-s: Errrrmrr... No? False?
wingpig: O... kay... perhaps instead I might suggest that {condition2} be made to be true. In this situation what will Y equal?
c r-s: True? Actually I've no idea. I'll get the c r-s manager to ring you back in five minutes or so.

Five hours later...

wingpig (in c r-s shop): Hello, shop. As you can see I have just expended an entire pound on a public omnibus journey in order to make {condition2} True. As I was advised some six months previously this would allow Y to be True.
c r-s: Oh. Erm, actually, that would be UTTER BOBBINS. I expect our member of staff was lying through their stupid teeth when you were told that. Only if {condition1} is true will Y also be true.
wingpig: Bastards.

A final outcome is awaited involving newly-proposed conditions four and five.

***

One advantage of having a slightly smaller rucksack than I'm used to is that it forces me to pack sensibly and lightly. This weighs barely thirteen kilogrammes (as assessed by some Ikea bathroom scales which are probably a little bit inexact) rather than my usual baggage-allowance-testing twenty-odd. The only thing I can think of which remains to be added at some point is the Trangia but that will be a kilogramme at most. Maybe it's just not having to take a tent and sleeping bag. Maybe it's finally achieving the correct trousers/shorts ratio (1/4). Usually I'd be worrying that such a small baggage for such a long holiday means that I Must Have Forgotten Something but the annoyance caused by the false premises of conditions two and three and the fact that there is still one day of work to get through is blocking any packing-worries I might otherwise be experiencing.

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