Saturday 12 November 2011: Hello Sailor.
Don't whatever you do, go and see the The Royal Yacht Britannia.
It's like a 1950s house in ship form.
The State Room has as much grandeur as the cold meat section at Asdas.
You don't even get to see the Queen's poop deck.
Dreary as fuck.
Except on one of the decks, where there is a huge chart
showing all the Maritime flags and their meanings.
I was weeping with laughter, on my knees.
Some of the meanings are totally hilarious.
But this one was my favourite.
I will grow up soon, I promise.