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The Pensioner

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Tuesday 10 January 2012: And They're Off!

Much excitement North of the Border as the hated Westminster Unionists unexpectedly lit the fuse on the slow burning referendum campaign and brought an instant response from the hated hard line Nationalist zealots ensconced at Holyrood. It's a page turner, I'll tell you. It'll run and run. Like a tap. Or a bath, perhaps. I imagined myself before the cameras, a knowing chuckle and shake of the head. And then, drawing myself up, and looking right at that lens, a carefully crafted statement; skilfully delivered; a man of substance and integrity. Leadership! The most important decision this country has been asked to make in over 300 years. The crowd falls silent, listening to every word. The gravity of it all. The very here and now! Together we shall make history. Women swoon, tears well in mens' eyes. The Pensioner's time has arrived!

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