Service history

Purchased 2005, King's Lynn. Served admirably and with distinction in all fields: including but not limited to Sheffield, York, Krakow, Manchester, Chongqing, Prague, Paris, London, Amsterdam, Leeds, Shanghai, Helsinki, Newcastle - visits to Three Gorges Dam, Auschwitz, X'ian. Survived 2 years of sixth form, 3 of uni, 1 in between, nearly 1 since; all attendant parties, nights out, walking due to inability to afford car. Survived Reading Festival 2006, VFest 2008. Survived occasionally tyrannous reigns of several girlfriends. Worn during competitive participation in Football, Basketball, Cricket, Hockey, Table Tennis, Frisbee (Ultimate and otherwise). Scaled multiple trees, becoming stuck in one in Bawsey. Appeared in unsuccessful audition tape for 'Deal or No Deal'. Instrumental in escape from charging herd of cows in Wales. Earned minor reproach (Apr. 2008) for providing poor protection from falling fruit bowl - officially pardoned on basis of previous excellence and lack of other shoes. Exposed to most forms of terrain and bodily fluid yet retain pleasing brownness.
Jack Smith

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cold shoes

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