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Kinda Horrigans

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Friday 4 May 2012: The overnight...

798/365: ... and yet another blip from the day after. This time because we had the evening to ourselves and it was just soooooooooooooooo nice that blipping really didn't feature.

The day started with *points to the picture above* the children packing their overnight bags to stay with their friend A. Felix, packed very precisely. Just the right amount of clothes (neatly folded), his toothbrush and toothpaste and a blanket he likes. Maddy had so much in her case that it took me clamping the thing between my legs to get it to shut and even then there was stuff that wouldn't go in. Obviously everyone needs to take a ribbon, stuffed cat and some fuzzy felt in a tin... right?! Anyway, they went and I was very brave and they were perfectly perky about it. I'd made them a couple of cards which I'd promised which said that I loved them (Felix had been a little bit worried about it), and they took those with them too.

After that, a day of working from home. Seem to have spent all day writing and writing and writing stuff! When Nick got home from school minus the kids it was pretty weird. Quiet. Weird. Calm. Weird! We decided to go out to dinner (what a rare, rare treat!) and headed off into town. As we were driving Nick mentioned something about Felix and the thought of Felix waking in the night crying (as he often does) without me being there made the tears well. I'm so pathetic!!

I pulled myself together (because I'm a big brave girl *grin*) and we had a nice meal - occasionally I'd catch myself thinking 'this is how life used to be' though. It's been getting on for 9 years since we've had a night to ourselves. You put to the back of your mind how it used to be, don't you? But this was a taste of freedom. Eating a meal without having to go 'don't mess with that... it's coming soon... don't go on the floor... but you ordered it so that's what you've got...' etc! Most strange.

Oh, and you know the thing I've really discovered? Relaxing. For the first time in years I didn't have to have the mummy bit of my brain switched on. We have no family to support us and the relentlessness of being responsible can get really tiring. But, just temporarily. That part of us was off. I remember feeling this relaxed years ago when we used to go to yoga classes together... but we haven't had time since then... and there was that lovely relaxed feeling back again. It's amazing how much life can feel like a treadmill if you never get the chance to get off once in a while.

Later today their mess, chaos, noise, shouting... laughing, cuddling, funny, curious faces will be back and life will resume. And I'll love them being here and us being our little family again.

PS ... but I did enjoy our night of freedom
PPS ... and... relax...

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