it's gonna be me

after spending the entire first hour of work listening to lifehouse's "broken" on loop (i've been in a very blue mood the past couple of... weeks... life, and this has been stuck in my head since yesterday), i had to break it up. so i played "it's gonna be me". wow... so bad and yet so good.

this is a christmas decoration that is broken out ever year. it's tacky and awful and the wish list has never been erased since the first time i wrote on it, probably when i was ten. it's not so much a list as it is only one request:
"i want to decide who lives and who dies."

what kind of kid writes that? a kid who watches too much mst3k.

a pleasant surprise last night as i was woken up at midnight by a text message from an old and short lived flame! this totally came from out of nowhere! and it was even more dreamlike in that i didn't notice my alert go off, i just happened to wake up and look at the phone. the adventure begins again...

and when it rains it pours. right now i am getting ready to go out with another friend i haven't seen in a long time.

"i am damaged at best, like you've already figured out..."