342 Days Old

She's behind me? What like right behind me?
Or do I have time to escape behind me?
She's close? Up by butt close? Oh rubbish,
I can be speedy.....on the wooden floors,
On this carpet, I am kinda stuck...
rescue me quick?
What you mean fight my own battles?
Isn't that what your there for? to save me?
No, ok fine, Ill just bash her with her barbie when she gets here...!