IVF Journey: 31w4d pregnant

This is my IVF diary. My husband and I have been trying to have a baby for four years now, and have a diagnosis of 'unexplained infertility'. We have finally reached the top of the waiting list for IVF - a form of assisted conception. I'm blogging about what happens as it happens, as a kind of therapy for me and as an awareness raising exercise of what IVF is all about.

More than two weeks living in the hospital and I’m really struggling. I’m so desperately pleased that Kipling is still safe inside me and we’re getting to the point now when if he’s born the neonatal care he’ll need will be less invasive. The blood pressure is still too high and does fluctuate a bit, but has not escalated as quickly as the doctors expected. Which is good. But it means I have to stay here, maybe for another seven weeks. I desperately hate being here, being in hospital, all the routines, being away from home and the husband. I wish the pregnancy was over. And I feel terribly terribly guilty every time I feel that.

To document how it is going, here’s some stats:

Drugs I take every day:
Cyclizine (150mg) and Metoclorpromide (10mg) (for nausea)
Labitolol: 900mg (was on 400 when I came in)
Nifedipene: 60mg
Daltepanin Injection

My blood pressure – on the drugs – is fairly ‘stable’ at around 150/95. This highest it has been this week is 180/125.

The normal day goes like this:
2am: Blood pressure test
6am: Blood pressure test
7am: Breakfast
8am: Blood pressure test, blood draw, urine test, drugs
10am: Doctor’s rounds
11am: Trace of fetal heartrate
12noon: Lunch
2pm: Blood pressure test, drugs
4pm: Blood pressure test
5pm: Dinner
6pm: Blood pressure test, drugs
8pm: Blood pressure test
9pm: Tea and toast
10pm: Blood pressure test, drugs