Shoes

I can see now that at the start, a year ago, I wanted to try to replace Teleri, to fill her shoes, even though I knew full well that I couldn't. This was certainly true, for example, here on Blip where I've had much difficulty finding my own voice and style, but where I also had a strong feeling that I had to participate for the sake of all her friends here.

This image came to me when I seized this pair of red shoes, which she used for gardening, at the very last second before sending a box of her shoes to start their second-hand careers. The brown ones are mine, of course.

Another reflection which comes to mind with this image is that a year ago, I was amazed I was still standing, I had depended on Teleri for so much. Especially at times of crisis. Now I'm more concerned that I haven't moved much - and I know I'll need to.

We have our own separate directions now, even though she is at my heels. The wish to replace her, while still there, is fading, like the shoes. I don't know what dance we're doing in these positions - I guess I'm still trying to understand our dance.

I'm going to try to turn coments off - I don't want people to feel they have to say something. This is a meditative series I feel I have to do, and it helps just to know that some people see the images.