Warmth

We had to take my daughter to the ER last night. I was so stressed I could feel my throat and chest constricting. We have had to do this before with our son when he had the flu, but at the time, there was comfort in knowing that it was indeed the flu that he was fighting. Not something random and unknown.

Last night, we didn't know what was going on with our baby girl. My husband was out at a function with old high school buddies and about an hour after I had tucked my kids into bed, my little honey woke up screaming. I tried to console her but couldn't. And then I noticed large welts appearing all over her little body. They started as a small raised bump which looked like a bug bite and then within minutes, each welt was over four inches in diameter. She was miserable. After five minutes, the welts covered both legs from the knees down and a full shoulder. Her cheeks and lips were swelling. And normally I am pretty calm in medical situations but I could feel my panic growing. I called my husband, he would be home in ten minutes. I called my Mother-in-law and told her of my plans to take my daughter to the hospital. She offered to come right over to care for our son. After talking to our on-call doctor, the decision was finalized to get her to a Pediatric ER.

The welts grew worse and by the time we arrived to the hospital and she began to get evaluated, they were all over her. It was terrible. Horrible. And even more unnerving was the doctors consensus, "It's just an allergic reaction". "Well to what???", we both asked. She doesn't have any known allergies. Why is her skin swelling all of the sudden. Why has she suddenly been having low grade fevers off and on? My husband was a little miffed with the doctor's quick diagnosis. No tests. No second opinion. Just, "give her some benadryl". But, we had to remind ourselves that he is the doctor and we were at one of the best children's hospitals in the State.

So now we wait. She woke up with welts again this morning. The benadryl calmed it down. When the benadryl wore off, they started to come back just as bad as last night. All I kept thinking last night was that I wished that she had been under the care of our family doctor. There has never been an unknown with him. He has always been able to pinpoint every single thing that any of us have ever gone in for. So we will be visiting him in the morning. Just for our own peace of mind. It is excruciating seeing our daughter in such discomfort and if it is just viral, then I want to have a second opinion given by the doctor who has never led us astray with his medical knowledge.

I didn't even plan on talking about this tonight. I have been working on taking deep breaths today and just trying to relax my nerves. A nice quiet rainy day in has really helped. Lots of little hugs and cuddles. And the warmth of the family phone calls (because word travels fast in our group) have really helped to alleviate some stress. I really can't think of a more uncomfortable feeling than walking out of the hospital with no solid answers. But at least we felt confident that any more serious matter had been ruled out.

It has felt good to express this. The only thing in life that matters is the health of my children. My family. My friends. The well being of others. Anything and everything else just isn't really all that significant. Until real stress is felt, all the rest can seem quite ridiculous. Focusing on what is important is all that is important. And I hope that as a mother, a wife, a daughter, a friend......I hope to never lose sight of that. Because I think that when people lose track of what is really important in life, they lose out on life. And I don't ever want to be a person that loses out on life.

Life is beautiful. And life is precious. Life is meant to be enjoyed. And I truly feel that I make considerable efforts to make the time to enjoy it. It's all of the sweet little moments that I enjoy so much. The details rather than just the big picture. I'm a people pleaser and all we 'pleasers' ever want is for everyone to be content and happy. And here I go again with my 'Abstract Eyes' philosophies.....

The End. (for now) :)