TheOttawacker

By TheOttawacker

LEGOtown destroyed in midnight bombing raid

We hear the noises in the night. Thuds and booms, crashes and rolling thunder. In our dreams, we imagine bombs falling on distant cities, the Blitz; in our nightmares, we imagine it happening to us.
 
But then we wake up, shake ourselves gently, roll over, drift off back to a peaceful sleep.
 
But the morning reveals the true extent of the horrors. A city laid waste. Destroyed. Smashed into a million pieces.
 
During the night, unseen forces, possibly feline, have come down from the hills and, finding their play area overcrowded with new human habitation, have wrought revenge. Destruction. Nought hath power like nature.
 
**
 
On another note, I read in The Guardian that an early example of recycling had been discovered in Pompeii. It was quite a fascinating read, about how all crap was dumped outside the city walls and they had teams of people getting all the bits of masonry etc. they could reuse out of the waste, and placing it in pile that were believed to be for new-builds etc. The article is here.
 
Of course, me being the mature and incredibly responsible person that I am, my attention was immediately drawn towards the lead researcher: Kevin Dicus. I started giggling at the table, getting nominally interested looks from wife and son in the next room. After a couple of minutes of this, I finally got the question: “What is so funny?”
 
So I explained. “Can you imagine,” I said, “being the lead architect on a dig into Pompeii, and your name is Kevin Dicus?”
 
“Yes, and so what”
“Do you think his nickname is ‘Biggus’?”
“What?”
“Biggus Dicus! Maybe he is married to Incontinentia?”
“What?”
“Incontinentia Buttox.”
 
By now, I was almost rolling on the floor, Ottawacker Jr. too, although I like to think he was laughing at me rather than at the reference (although, with him, one never quite is sure).
 
“Jesus, woman,” I said, in between gasps for air. “We’re watching Michael Palin’s Around the World in 80 Days” at the moment, don’t tell me you don’t remember The Life of Brian?”
 
“Oh, that,” she said. “Yes, very droll.”
 
I’m wasted here, I honestly am.

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