Tyre marks

For those of you who don't know (and that was me until this afternoon), the coloured marks painted on new tyres mean that the good natured fellows from Kwik-Fit can identify the brand and size at a distance. This fellow is a Pirelli and his appearance in my life ended a day which gave me a fascinating insight into the BBC.

It all started yesterday afternoon when a charming American lady from Training and Development booked me to shoot a series of portraits for their website, starting today. She described the job and I said I would bring studio lights, only to be told 'you can't plug anything into a BBC socket without it being tested first by an engineer'...

... what nothing????

There was a long pause of incredulity from my end of the line...

As it was too late to hire a power pack I found an alternative, but at least I still had a parking permit.

I'm due to meet Frank, my first subject, at 10am this morning. As I like to get to locations nice and early, relax, have a coffee first, I'm at White City by 9.30am. The parking permit, I am told is at reception, all I have to do is pick it up.

Jaw-dropping moment of the morning.

I am told I cannot enter the car park without a further day pass and unless personally escorted by a BBC member of staff!!!

Failing to kidnap Jeremy Clarkson on the way in and being half an hour early I dutifully follow instructions and sit patiently in my car, in the drop-off zone until Frank arrives for work.

At 10am Frank comes over to my car, sporting my coveted BBC day pass and a smile, which quickly turned to mild alarm as he notices a flat rear tyre.

At this point you have to understand that I've been in the BBC waiting zone for over half an hour. Fifteen minutes is your maximum, after which they send the Daleks out to exterminate you.

Frank is calm 'Phone the AA and I'll sort out the BBC', he says.

Not convinced that I can call them out for a mere flat tyre, I do so while the BBC head of security arrives. Lovely chap, tells me to go and do my shoot and he'll sort everything out. I hand him the keys... was that wise?

From there on in everything moved like clockwork. Nice shoot, good subjects, the AA phoned, found the car, did the job and reception phoned Frank to say my car was ready the moment I finished the job.

The only downside was that the replacement tyre cost exactly the same amount as I will bill for the shoot today... hey-ho!

Another shoot tomorrow, and Monday and Tuesday, so not the end of the world.

At least I know how to identify tyre brands now.