Friday 4 May 2012
On a plane journey a few years back, I watched the movie 'things that got lost in the fire'. I don't remember many details about the storyline. The title, however has stuck with me, and I have thought about it often in the events of my last year. I thought about it when I saw this lost boot on the pavement. A little girl's favourite boot perhaps?
There is a biblical narrative of our lives being tested with fire at the end of our days. And of the things that really matter, that are really of value, being the things that survive. The gold.
The last year has held for me, heart wrenchingly difficult times and events, mind bogglingly difficult cunundrums and many days of clinging on to tiny morsels of hope. Sometimes I have wondered what it is all worth. But through each small tunnel, when I'm out the other side, I have realized that although some things were lost in the fire, although some things have to be grieved, some things have survived. And they are the gold, the things that really matter.
I have found strength I didn't know I had, learned wisdom, and dignity, and held onto hope for tomorrow against the odds. I have discovered my true friends, learned how to love, but also learned to set boundaries so not to be taken advantage of, become content in who I am, and begun to believe in the gifts and happiness that I have to give and share.
Looking back, I realise that many of the the things that got lost in the fires of my journey are small fry compared to the beauty and worth of the things I have gained.
I don't always feel this positive, but it's good, on a good day, to remind myself of these things!
(if you read all the way to the end of that spiel....thank you!)