julie

my little 5-person 6391 Development course, led by Tim, met today. It is Todd, Alan, Julie, Charlie (the last one I need a photo for, though I've tried before) and myself; all (E)GTAs at various points in our English doctoral studies. Though Tim is ever knowledgeable and candid, I always leave feeling a bit tired and daunted at what is in store for me, both immediately and in the somewhat distant future. But that is okay because I am always going to feel like that. Today's discussion touched somewhat on the themes present in my in-progress blog entry (that is Tim's there, by the way; an obituary to Adrienne Rich) about my first true peer-reviewed journal project that I will begin this summer. My article actually stemmed from one of my current literature classes (on a work I knew next to nothing about, initially) and exists now in a rough form--acceptable for a flying-colors grade in the course but needs to be extended and expanded in order to submit to a journal somewhere. Anyhow, I have never received such an accolade before, recommendation that I might really be on to something. All these thoughts and more will appear on my go-round with the Department blog next Tuesday--stayed tuned, my friends.

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Had another nightmare last night--totally commonplace for me, though the roots must surely be different. This was unique in that instead of waking myself by screaming or jolting out of sleep, I was awakened by the stinging pain coming from my mouth. Apparently, somehow, I'd bitten off the side of my tongue in my fright or pain or surprise or whatever (the dream itself is long misremembered, unintentionally and this is much welcomed). It was all very confusing because I thought I'd only felt it in my dream, that my subconscious had conjured the throbbing (I don't remember it hurting immediately, physically, when I awoke) but upon reaching the bathroom, to see for sure, I spit into the sink. Indeed, I spat blood (and for a good few times).

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My official office hours begin in two minutes. Time to open the door, circulate some air, read some Heidegger for tonight's class, and carry on. That is all they ask for.