Home Sweet H_me

Our fridge, complete with some of the smile-inducing paraphernalia we keep magnetised to it. I especially love the photo of littleA dressed in a spidermancostume, it makes me snigger every time I reach for milk.

***
Dad came home today. Yay.

He's not great though. There's something missing and I'm worried about him. He seems very low and has no energy and certainly no desire to get up and go. The chemo has been put back a bit now, I guess to give his body time to recover ready for the next onslaught.

The reality of what this chemo is and what it's doing to my Dad has suddenly hit home this past seven days and it's one of the toughest things I've had to sit and bear witness to. I think Thor's hammer would strike a softer blow. Mum is finding it incredibly tough, mostly because Dad seems incapable of thinking logically about how serious all this business really is or taking control of what is happening to him in any way, and I'm sure he's wishing everyone would just leave him be and stop mithering.

I've found myself watching the latest TV ad for Macmillan a lot today. Dad reacted exactly like the man at the beginning, and I think he still is. He's not alone and I know he knows that, but he sure does look like he feels like that.