hang on in there

...which is what everyone's telling me. i am, honest. just that sometimes it would be nice to get let go and not feel like this :-(

does talking help? well, it never hurts, for sure. thing is, there've been times in the couple of conversations we've had (online) when i've forgotten about this and we've just talked like normal. then i think 'hang on a minute...' it's not so much that i want to be constantly reminded of what happened, nor do i intend bringing it up every five minutes for the next decade as some kind of punishment. but it seems wrong to forget it all; skip over it because an apology has been made.

i know life has to go on, but this isn't something that can be fixed with an apology, it's too big for that. it wasn't just that you didn't tell me about this thing, it's that you didn't say a whole other bunch of stuff, for five or six months at least. this isn't sticking plaster territory, it's more like several broken limbs. i'm still in a&e working out if we can fix this while you seem to be thinking i'm all better and ready to start climbing trees again.