Calm

I was going to try and not blip a beach today, but that obviously didn't quite work out!!
Bella's been out at a birthday party which meant I had some time to myself. I usually love time on my own but at the moment I can't stand it. I'm feeling really anxious about 'stuff', it's that constant butterflies in tummy feeling. When I'm on my own I just sit there and worry, nibbling away at my finger nails (something I haven't done since I was a teenager!). I also spend far too long staring in the mirror wondering who the hell the person looking back at me is. I still think of myself as looking how I used to and it startles me sometimes when I see that I don't look like that anymore. My eyebrows and lashes have belatedly decided to fall out and I'm finding that much more difficult than losing my hair. Being on the beach takes my mind off everything, I don't care that I look wierd, I don't worry about what the month's got in store for me, it just makes me feel happy and contented.