Being with Carol...

Today has been intense.....a good friend of mine is dealing with that hellish cancer shit...man what a horrendous situation that is! this woman is so strong, so inspirational to me....radiation has wrecked her throat, chemo is making her feel like shit...she has lost weight, and believe me she was already on the lean side! But, despite all that...she remains positive and energetic! i'm sure she's had her times of falling apart, and yet she is able to be positive and is so damn determined to not let this take her..... my admiration is so huge, my sadness also.....to see how this disease robs us of our energy and vitality is so hard to witness!

I spent the day making sure she ate enough, we gotta put some fat on those bones.....and she was so agreeable to doing what needed to be done! she is my hero right now, she inspires me with her understanding of what is happening to her body! but it sure leaves me feeling pretty fragile myself! how terrifying this disease is.....how scary to be dealing with the potential incapacity of your loved one....i can only imagine how painful and sad it all is! letting that touch my heart is difficult...but necessary. There is a wonderful group of folks organized to help support her and her family thro this ordeal...15-20 of us have been organized to be with her one day every 2 weeks....with others on standby....what a wonderful thing to witness! So much love and commitment to this woman who has been such a vital part of this community. It is amazing what we can do when we all come together and share the load!

so, now that i've made and consumed a lovely dinner, and a couple of glasses of wine....and we have 2 lovely new wwoofers with us.....i can only give over to the love i feel for those around me: my wonderful partner, my daughers, new friends and old ones.....please...hug whomever you love...hold them close and tell them how much you love them! you just don't know what tomorrow will bring!

Hopefully it will be a bright and sunny day ahead of you...with no worries....but who knows!

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