horns of wilmington's cow

By anth

Sunny Disposition

Another work day, another lunchtime wander and (eventually) another cemetery. This time Dean Cemetery, right beside this place - Dean Gallery. Nice to see the sun getting in on the act.

Lots to think about while walking about. Got a bit of a textual ear-bashing over email from a friend (who is a true friend so can get away with it) about focus and direction. Told lots of things I know but didn't really want to admit. Stubborn as I am I'm not going to take on all of the advice, but I need to get the finger out with a few other things. Why is it so hard to make the decisions for yourself that you can easily tell other people they should be making?

I get frustrated when I can see what someone has to do and they come to me for advice and then just don't seem to listen. And then I see myself doing it, and get frustrated with myself, which in turn makes it harder to do the thing that you know will actually help, and if you'd done it ages ago you wouldn't be worrying about it right now.

I need to get to the weekend and rediscover some of that focus.

By god self-pity is so fecking annoying. Someone slap me.

In other news: Everything is perfect, but not nearly so interesting... Which really does hold true. Think about restaurant reviews, or movie reviews, anything of that ilk. The really good ones; the interesting ones; the ones where the writer gets to exercise his vocabulary and expound on his true feelings, those are the ones where he gets to detail the inadequacies, where a mis-directed starter lead to a dry-cleaning bill, where the audience started booing only 10 minutes in.

Soap operas work (if you watch them, I've been spared that particular pain for the last 7 years or so) because things go wrong. People cheat, get found out, reconcile, shoot each other. Things going right provide a short burst of celebration, but no gossip. "Did you see Eastenders last night?" is never followed by, "Yeah, and who would have thought it, the DNA test proved it was his kid and they're both happy with the result!"

Terminator without the threat of apocalypse; Bond without a megalomaniacal bad guy "Actually yes, I see your point Double-Oh-Seven, Kato, switch off the nuclear space death-ray"; Aliens without the chest-burst; Any single film involving someone trying to get into the car without the obligatory dropping of the keys in a blind panic and the sudden appearance in a close-in shot of the victim of the killer standing over her (for they are almost always 'her' - what is it with women and dropping keys?).

Things go wrong, it entertains. Hell, even the news would be dropped to one slot a week if everything in the world was rosy.

I'm not saying that we shouldn't strive for better things. Limit those things and people in the world who are bad. But just maybe realise that sometimes we can't make things better and we should either leave well alone or try a different route.

I think I may have inadvertently slipped into the change from George Dubya to Obama. There, that thought alone has cheered me up.

p.s. sorry for the waffle, sometimes I really am too bored and it all sort of 'splurges'.

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