The Wonders of Modern Science

My memory is shot, my knees have gone wonky, hair is grey, my hands are more use than my eyes (careful)!
I collected my hearing aid, tried it out in the pub: didn't have to say "Pardon" once. Next door have had to turn the sound back on their TV as they don't have to listen to mine. It will cost me £85 if I lose it or damage it otherwise, that is it.