And then it hit me

Took The Girl Racer to Gatwick; got stuck in a traffic jam the last couple of miles which was really frustrating. But we met up with The Back Flip Boy and his family and had a pleasant hour of ETC (Enormous Tea Consumption - see extra) before seeing them off at the departure gates. Unusually, she blubbed and I didn't; it is nearly always the other way around.

I felt very flat at work but it didn't really hit me until I put the guest bed in her bedroom when I got home. An empty room is one of the saddest things known to humanity. It is incredibly full of pale and ghostly emotions, the recently departed person still a vague outline like one of those optic leftovers you get from staring at a bright light; but you know it won't last. I looked out of the window and thought of two weeks ago to the day when we had walked all over London; I came downstairs thinking of the meals she had cooked, the cakes she baked; I went into the kitchen and found her mugs with mould in them and her paperwork on the fridge It will probably be nine months before we see her again. That's a long time ...

On the plus side TSM's sister has planned a visit over from Australia in April. And we are off to America on Saturday and have two weeks off work. But I suspect Christmas will see us thinking a lot about the people we can't be with and the ones we can never be with again. Quite a year this one ...

Managed the gym when I got home. And read The Daydreamer's blog  entry, a book review of Amy Schumer's Girl With The Lower Back Tattoo which I am listening to when I drive. If you want to learn a bit about how women end up in abusive relationships, listen to it, particularly if you are a man. And think hard on it..

The Dizzle delivered an interesting bit of news tonight. He is signing up as an army reservist. That will be one to watch closely... Good luck young man.

PS - if you look at the blip carefully you will see the reference to coffee just to the left of my head. One of those other things I loved about having her home - coffee conversations. I hadn't realised or had forgotten that she had done a barista course in Australia and was someone who knew how it should be made ...


LOOKING BACK:

Ironically, five years ago today The Girl Racer came back from Australia and New Zealand and I noted then that this was probably the pattern for the future ...

Eleven years ago she looked rather different ...