All about Lallybroch

By Lallybroch

The life & death of a shopping trolley

Once upon a time a brand spanking new shopping trolley rolled off the production line. His steel frame sparkled as the light hit it, and he was so proud to be on his way to fufil his destiny at the Asda store in Livingston. What an honour this would be.

Over the coming years, he helped thousands of customers carry their weekly shop with pride. No matter how heavy the load, he never complained or grumbled. Even when the children sitting in the toddler seat emitted ear splitting tantrums, he carried on as the true professional he was. As the years went by, and middle age set in, his body began to show some battle scars. It's no surprise that after being bashed into fellow trollies, having children jump on the back of him to race around the store and being forced through potholes in the carpark, that he sometimes found it hard to go in a straight line.

Until one dark day, when the supermarket had closed for the evening and he was having a well earned snooze with his comrades, some drunken louts happened to pass by. They spied him, and decided it would be such fun to use him as a mode of transport to get them home. If only Asda had introduced the £1 deposit system, his kidnappers may never have got away with this dastardly deed! However, there was nothing the trolley could do to stop one lad jumping inside, and the other pushing him outside the supermarket boundaries. Along the road they went, turning one corner after another until poor trolley was completely lost and disorienated. Before he knew it, they had left the town far behind them and were in the countryside. Surely his fate was not to be the watery grave of the Union Canal which had befallen so many of his friends previously? But no. Worse was to come. He was picked up, thrown over a hedge and landed in the most undignified position in the middle of a field.

Where he still lies now - another tragic statistic - a lonely, abandoned supermarket trolley.

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