Don’t panic!

This notice on the back of the gîte entrance door has intrigued me since I arrived. I’m showing the English translation here. Are we really expecting these natural disasters?

Quiet day with picnic lunch and then Skype reading group. I found I’d lost the front door key and then had to be rescued to get in.Will search car tomorrow and then go back to picnic place.

Have looked up YouTube help on nationalisation interview. Terrifying! No chance I can mug up on all this.