UFOs in Ottawa
I lifted my head from the screen, stretched, farted, scratched a hidden part of myself and looked out of the window. Whereupon I nearly fell out of my chair. For there, high in the air above the chimney of the house to the back of us was what looked like the least successful balloon of all time. If the Montgolfier brothers had come up with this shite, they'd have been laughed out of town.
I looked again. It wasn't a balloon. It was a man levitating. No it wasn't, it was a man in a basket cutting down branches... a sure sign that the house behind us is going to be developed or renovated. Please God renovate. Please God renovate.
Either way, it was much more interesting than my translation, so I stood and watched for a few minutes.