The Shadows Of Forgotten Moustaches

A trying day.  Trying & failing.

My confidence is a fragile thing at its best, and failures hit me very hard.

I'm not kidding when I say I've had this beaten into me.  If I succeed, it was to be expected and was probably very easy.  Fail and it's because I'm stupid.  And the more I try and nevertheless fail, the more stressed I get.  It's exhausting.

Today I was trying to debug a program and it just wouldn't happen.  I could not access the code.  I roped in 2 colleagues who checked all my settings and yep, we all had the same settings.  But when they used my job to debug, it worked for them but never for me.

Oh how I didn't laugh.

I would avoid my company for the rest of today.