TT'S TRADITIONAL XMAS STAND-UP SHOW

No Xmas chez Wilson would be complete without Tiny Toy's annual comedy spectacular.
He's been in rehearsals for days now, so please put on your masks and give a big socially distanced welcome to Uckfield's very own King of Comedy – Tiny Toy!
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❝]Hello, good evening and welcome to my Xmas stand-up Comedy show!
Some of you here may not know who I am, but that's okay – I don't know who some of you are either…
Not a lot of people know this, but I've got a Black Belt in Origami – and tonight I'll have you in creases…
I got a rejection letter from the origami university today – I’m not sure what to make of it.
Did you hear that they're broadcasting the World Origami Championships? It's on paper-view.
What do you call paper figures that sit on top of your desk? Stationary art
How does Father Christmas wash his hands? With Santa-tizer.
Knock, knock
Who’s there?
Honda.
Honda who?
Honda first day of Christmas my true love sent to me…
Knock, knock!
Who’s there?

Dexter.

Dexter who?

Dexter halls with boughs of holly…
What's Piers Morgan's favourite Christmas song? Walking off on air Which relative will not be at Chris Whitty's Christmas dinner? Aunty Vaxxer
Which vaccine did Father Christmas get? Mince Pfizer
Why did Rudolph's nose have too self-isolate? It failed the lateral glow test
Which vaccine did the Three Wise Men have? The Wiser Jab
How do you know the heating bill for December is too high? Your Dad won't even let you open the windows on your advent calendar.
So, that about wraps up the show for 2021 – I hope to see you all again next Xmas – thank you, goodnight and HAPPY XMAS TO YOU ALL! ❞