Dump

It is known that surplus booster stages were disposed of here at the official end of the programme. What is not known is whether they had been fuelled and, if so, whether they had been adequately decontaminated before disposal.

Assurances have been received that they were never fuelled and that, if they were fuelled, they were decontaminated properly, and, in fact, that the special fuels were not dangerous, the mass graves in Fife notwithstanding, and so no decontamination was needed, and that if the special fuels were dangerous this was not known at the time.

These assurances can only remind one of those given by an unfortunately well-known public figure recently about his attendance of certain gatherings. As in that case there is only one way to be sure: take off and nuke the site from orbit. This solution has not, yet, been authorised in either case.

On a related note I have made enquiries and been assured, by a source I can not name but regard as extremely reliable, that the aforementioned public figure has not and will not be briefed on the programme. He is regarded as being far too serious a security risk given his Russian puppet-master, as well as being, frankly, far too dim to understand the implications of what is now known. The Queen is believed to have made this decision herself, although obviously with the full support of senior figures in the security services.

If it becomes necessary, the monarch will, as previously, make their decision after taking advice from trusted senior military and security personnel: the clown will learn of the event only after the deed is done. This is as it should be.

In these days we must be thankful for small mercies.