I THOUGHT I was joking.

I decided to shop elsewhere; partly for a change, partly for a meal made by A. N. Other, and partly as a put-me-on 'till Pension(s) day(s).  With one on the last working day, and one every 4th Friday there is the odd month (Or two) where they either coincide or fall within days. This month they're on today and next Wednesday. Add to that the enhanced Winter fuel allowance plus an ebay sale & I find I can have my monthly "Full English" and do a spot of victualing @ Cranston's Food-Hall after all.

I shopped at a well-known, Scottish sounding, S/market.  One of my purchases was a 200gm pack of, supposedly smoked, allegedly dry cured back Bacon = six Rashers.
I bunged some onto the Teppanyaki and saw through it; I thought:-
"I could read the Paper through that!"
I thought I was joking!  - until I decided to verify the hypothesis -SO - I whipped it off PDQ to test, hence the dark "smuts" from the last lot done minutes before I changed my mind and did the rest.  Sure enough I could read through it.

In fairness I suspect it was the make-weight for 200gm in six rashers = 33.33333gm per rasher.  To be really fair it was much the thinest, but tomorrow I'll weigh six of Cranston's rashers for comparison.

I said "allegedly" dry cured - BUT - if it was, there was a helluva lot of steam rising from it PLUS what closely resembled water slowly disappearing from the metal surface.  
One of my recurring Mantras:-
We shall SEE, tomorrow.