Arachne

By Arachne

Stress and distress

14 months into my 'new' job, I have done only 64% (42 hours) of my compulsory training. Most of what I have done has been dire: banal, tedious, boring, facile, mind-numbing, patronising... Some of what I have had to do is stuff I myself have previously taught but the law says my employer has to prove that it has told me what colour a fire-extinguisher is so I have had to do the test that proves I know.

The worst of it (health and safety, safeguarding) was video-based long before Covid but since then the rest of it is too so today I - just me, my laptop and my headphones - did a three-hour course, punctuated by four multiple-choice tests, in Self-Care. Now, self-care is important in our line of work and if I'd been in a roomful of people, where we could discuss the issues then chat over tea-breaks, I'd have engaged pretty well. But since I couldn't, once I'd got use to the trainer's voice I went into settings and speeded her up by 25%. And once I was used to that I set her to 1.5 times normal speed. The multiple choice questions have a low bar but, just in case I was asked a complicated one, every now and then I photographed the screen so I could refer to it when the test came up.

As an ex-trainer, who took my role seriously - including my responsibility to create an enjoyable and productive space for my students -  I am ashamed and sad that 'training' has come to this. But given that things are as they are, I was pleased to be emailed my certificate 2 hours and 15 minutes after I'd started the three-hour course.

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