Welcome To The Boozarium

Welcome to The Boozarium.
It's not an aquarium
but you may drink like a fish here
if you wish.

Or just a quick one perhaps?
A swift half a whisky a rum?
You're welcome.

But why not ask the staff to pull
you a pint or two
or three or four or more.
You can swallow your fill until you're full
if you fancy getting sloshed juiced
smashed blitzed.

We hark back to spit & sawdust.
To cussing and brawling.
Though it's worth noting
current laws apply - NO SMOKING.

But we are a living museum.
We put on quite a show.
No need to worry though,
our bark is worse than our bite.

So feel free to drink until you're merry, morose,
angry, argumentative. You can pick a fight
with another bloke who's been on the sauce
the juice the hooch the liquid courage the piss.
You can take a swing at one another and miss
and collapse on the floor. We're happy
to pick you up the pieces and show you the door.
No recriminations. No questions asked.

So welcome to The Boozarium.
Come in and enjoy 'The Past.'

Family ticket?