No one bored in the board room

I managed to trick my friend and baby-faced manager David/WuggyBear into believing that we were going to a particularly dreadful meeting with one of our major suppliers who was hinting at wanting to exit their current contract. 
He was already formulating backup plans and trying to come up with solutions to keep the show on the road. 
Me, I was just being flustered and useless and intoning various choice expletives at the thought of the impending disaster, just like I would do in a real life crisis situation.  
But there was no crisis. Just a surprise birthday buffet laid out in our meeting room to mark is almost-40th-birthday. 
His real birthday is actually on Thursday but his new bride is jetting him off to New York for a long weekend. 
I reminded him that there is no obligation for them to call the child Brooklyn. Or Manhattan. Or Travelodge. 
And I tagged some particularly slanderous Orange Monstrosity jokes with his Instagram handle. Just so that he has a fun time at immigration in the US before being shipped back on the first plane to Ireland for being disrespectful to Trump Zedong.