Unexpectedly

For thirty years of my life, since the year I turned ten, the eleventh of September has held special meaning for me as the day that my dad passed away unexpectedly. I have commemorated it every year quietly by thinking about him and trying to remember what he was like...at best, it is a collection of sketchy memories...true ones, I mean, ones that come from my own mind rather than the stories I hear about him. It was already a heavy and momentous day to me, remembering a life changing event.

Then on Sept 11th of 2001, around this time of the morning, unexpectedly, some fanatical ....... decided to carry out their murderous plan on MY important day, changing history forever and making MY day THEIR day.

I remember clearly being furious and horrified at all the death and destruction, completely deflated by the sadness of knowing that nothing would ever be the same, sick with the realization that the repercussions of this act would last forever and just irritated to the core that the low life feathermuckers, if they just had to commit such a heinous act, couldn't pick another day!

So now Sept 11th is a day so immeasurably sad that I might have to simply skip it. I'll date everything September 12th today, won't look at a calendar after posting this, watch TV news or open a newspaper. Hope it works.