Dirty stop out pigeon.

Still pissed. Lost it's keys.

I did that once. Very drunk and a bit emotional, I stood in the hallway unable find my keys, I even emptied my voluminous bag out in the hallway. Eventually I got the man upstairs to kick down my door (not a euphemism) of my cheaply badly converted flat.
I stumbled in and lay on the sofa, the room spinning, there was something poking me in the arse (again not......) so I felt in my back pocket of my jeans. It was my keys.