I'm not your mother

I'm feeling a bit mixed toward teaching at the moment, which happens when I have to do more than 20 hours a week. Today I taught three lessons (it should only have been two, but I volunteered to take a class whose teacher has, as well not doing an awful lot in the classroom other than eating and shouting, gone AWOL (a problem for another day I'm trying to delegate to the boss; I can't be doing with nut-jobs). One lesson went okay, one went terribly, and one went pretty well (ironically enough, the one I chose to cover out of sheer professional acumen).

The students themselves are a mixed bag and when you're not in the mood for micro-managing them, a lesson can become quite hellish. In general, they're pretty bad for turning up late and it can be very difficult to prise their mobiles away from them. There are also a select few who turn up to class with no books and no pen or pencil. These students I find particularly annoying, especially when they look at me and shrug as if I should be providing them with what they need. My colleague explained that they are so used to being looked after and having their botties wiped that they find it difficult to do anything for themselves, including bringing stuff they need to university. Unbelievable.

It doesn't really make much difference, but telling them off in Arabic at least makes the other students laugh and hopefully make enough of an arse of them so that they change their behaviour next time. Blipped above is my rather skanky whiteboard showing the Arabic (phonetically written, and slightly different to Omani Arabic, I learned today) for "Why are you late?", "Don't use your mobile in class!" and my new favourite phrase, "Fayn haktek? Ana mesh mama!" which translates as "Where's your stuff? I'm not your mother!".

Other phrases I'd like to learn (but may need to get to know the students a better before asking) include "What the hell is that smell?" (for use on the bus during any given journey; today's ride home smelt of stinky feet) and "Shove your job up your arse!" (which I feel will come in handy sooner rather than later).