not on my watch

I don't particularly approve of the whole accessorising-yourself-by-dressing-your-child-stupidly thing, and am thus prevented from getting a wingpiglet-sized T-shirt printed with "I refuse to use my child as a billboard for a slogan" to protest against this practise. We've mostly managed to make do with gift-clothings, hand-me-down stuff and granny-knitted Junior Fisherman-style jumpers alongside the cheap functionality of the Asda babygrow and have been doubly lucky to have so far not encountered anything too obviously labelled or anything which is too much along the lines of being a tiny version of adult clothings. Babies have different requirements of clothings compared to adults, particularly regarding the frequent need to access their undersides whilst not completely removing all clothings yet removing them sufficiently to prevent them being dipped in anything which has been secreted from their undersides and clings there yet, pending removal. Trousers are a particularly daft thing to make in infant sizes whereas shoulder-strapped dungaree-type things have the advantage of helping to retain a nappy; waist-fastening trousers have a tendency to pull down and can only be fastened on the false waist created by the nappy seeing as babies don't have waists, and certainly not waists around which things can be particularly securely fastened. Whilst a hood is a much more useful thing in terms of being likely to stay on for more than two minutes a hat could be a conceivably useful item to help retain head-heat during cold weather and to keep the wind off the ears. Hats which do not protect the ears and whose design seems almost entirely dedicated to their appearance rather than their head-protecting ability are therefore stupid, and hats which are of a design almost exclusively reserved for old people which do absolutely nothing for the ears and very little for the occipital region are yet more stupid. I'm also slightly worried that the odd stray headbutt-like head-waggle might cause the inner edge of the peak to cause a dent in the forehead. I'm not going to do anything nasty like hide it or throw it in the bin but shall certainly start looking for more suitable ear-protecting winter-capable hats for him to wear when it's me choosing what he wears.