The sun shines out of your behind.

Don't you hate the sound of your own voice? Today I had no classes but had to go into school to do some recordings for the student's listening exams at the end of May. A recording session can often start of being fun because it feels like you're on the radio, but then any enjoyment gradually gives way to frustration and self consciousness.

Even if you makes a slight error, such as adding an 'a' or a 'the' where there isn't one in the text means you need to go back a few lines and re-record. That in itself is an annoying task because it's hard to keep the piece sounding naturally flowing. And usually, even after painstakingly tracing the curser back to the exact moment you need to press record, you'll go on to make the same bloody mistake three times over.

Another side effect of tracing back and checking over your piece is that you realise how annoying your voice is. I was sat there thinking that's not me! Who the hell is this guy? With his heavy breathing, nasaly voice and an accent that doesn't quite know where to place itself. Do I always sound like that? Last week one of the teachers actually told me that the recordings I had done so far were too quiet. I politely agreed and put it down to the mic being so close to my gob. But I secretly got worried because I knew that I was speaking at my natural volume. Maybe I have always spoke in a whisper and all my life people have just been to nice to tell me to speak up, as if I had some sort of problem.
Maybe that's why I sometimes get given a cider when I asked for a Stella.

Well from know on I'm a reformed guy. Next time I'm in the pub I'll beckon the barman over, close to my face, as if I'm going to tell him a juicy secret and then shout "PINT OF STELLA" in his ear. That should do the trick. Maybe then I'll sound normal.