Munchies!!!!!!

Bacon Banjo - Egg Banjo

Jackspeak - Guide to Royal Marines and Royal Navy Slanguage.


Large piglets - Oxymoron

Try to wipe from your mind all thoughts of these two day old piglets being wrenched from their mum. She is almost 11 feet long. They are tiddly, latched onto her organ stops 24 hours per day, feeding or sleeping. Look at that cute curly tail top left. BUT I'm a nasty barsteward.

Now a bit of time travel; in due course you will savour the aroma of crispy piglet before it is placed between two doorsteps of buttered fresh bread. Then you will close your eyes as your taste buds are assailed by that unique flavour. If you are fortunate the bacon may be accompanied by an egg and if you are very fortunate, a slice of black pudding from Stornoway, the best I have ever eaten. Try the cafe at the petrol station at Uig. I even offered to marry the bloke who cooked my breakfast there, nearly succeeded. I cannot stop myself from thinking how certain faith groups can cope with never enjoying this delight.

Last autumn, Mark, who owns the sow let our grandson ride on her back while her litter was sleeping, then James got to cuddle one of the piglets. Brilliant fun and a great way to introduce him to the farm animals; although he was far more intrigued with the tractors. Mum and her pals create these little things at regular intervals, they are an old breed called British Lops.

Mrs Booty is making slow headway. Coincidentally for lunch I cooked bacon banjos with mushrooms and cracking fresh coffee, could she taste it? Nah. Poor dear she could hardly swallow it, but liquidised bacon banjos aren't quite the done thing. She has tried gargling with Harpic to no avail, it may kill 99% of known germs but it's the other snidey bugger we cannot eliminate.

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