When Pumpkins Go Bad...

This guy looks like my back has felt until today. When I was 16 and I started getting trouble with it I was told it was "Because you're so tall." Excellent, thanks for that, I'll just try not to grow so much and that'll solve it. Fast forward 16 years and on the recommendation of a few people I go to a chiropractor, get my back x-rayed, and lo and behold there's a large-ish curve to one side in the spine.

The chiro has done it wonders, but I hadn't been for four weeks. I wasn't back to square one, but there was a definite shuffle back, so a few cracks and twists later and everything is feeling a little looser again. Next week there's a progress check, which should hopefully confirm everything is back on track, because up to the recent gap it has been having a fantastic effect.

Although I'm not subscribing to the philosophising behind the theory with connections across the universe and throwing away all medicine being good for the human race. The first time I heard all of this side of it (a month or so after I started going) I thought I'd drifted into a Scientology get-together by mistake. Although that would probably be more expensive. As an aside did you know that Ron L Hubbard once remarked that the easiest way to make a million was to invent a religion? Kind of prophetic don't you think?

I'm quite happy without a sky-fairy to guide me through life thank you very much. Mutual exclusivity of religions troubles me. Let's run on the assumption that someone is right. How do you know which one? Sure each one will say it's them, but how do they know?

I'd rather take my chances with a novel idea. Live life to enjoy it, but also to try and give enjoyment to other people around you. Try not to be nasty git. Hold doors open for people. And say thank you. Are you saying that some all-seeing deity is going to deny me entry to Halvalla just because I didn't go to a building once a week, or five times a day, to tell him how great he (or she) is? The good stuff will get ignored because I didn't pop in to say hi? That the mass murderer who confesses his sins before going to the chair gets entry through the pearly gates because he said sorry, when I, who have not (knowingly) killed anyone, and only last Friday helped an old lady cross the street, have a tainted soul?

Well fine. I don't want to be in your club. I'll be down there listening to some rock n' roll if you need me.

And there you have it, a rotting pumpkin to religion in six paragraphs.