Parenting styles

Bella's mom had an easter egg hunt in their back yard. About twenty children and roughly fifteen adults were in attendance, and it was a fascinating place to observe different parenting styles. Some parents paid 100% full-on blast-furnace attention to their child the entire time. Others chatted among themselves and were more willing to let the children play unattended. 

As I described the event to Sue, she said, "It's so hard to be a parent. Nobody ever tells you how to do it, and when you're young, dealing with your own neuroses, you can't help making mistakes. You just hope it doesn't scar your children forever, or that they find a good therapist one day." 

Those of us who were abused by our parents either swing the other way, and are too permissive (my M.O.) or repeat the abuse. Those whose parents were neglectful tend to smother their children, while those whose parents were overly-strict may err in not ever setting boundaries, and those who were adored by their parents may have felt overwhelmed, so they try to give their kids more space.  It's very, very difficult to find a middle way, to be a loving but wise parent, to give the children enough space but not too much. 

The Extra is Bella and one of her friends receiving detailed instructions about the rules for the egg games.