The lesser spotted sound man.

More and more 'sound men' are being discovered living in the wild in this country.
Often, a 'sound man' may get stolen or left behind after a documentary
(Channel 4 lost 28 to gypsies last year) as nobody really takes any notice of them.

You may find one lurking in the undergrowth of a local wood
or behind a skip on a council estate, but remember
the lesser spotted 'sound man' is a shy creature and
hard to see in brown/green Goretex and is sensitive to noise.

Should you see one, don't be afraid, they are tame, and are definitely
more frightened of you than you are of them.
Just call out softly: 'Recharged batteries' or 'Your mikes are very sensitive''
and they'll be your friend for life, and if you really want to seal the deal,
feed them by hand with ciabatta dipped in extra virgin olive oil and they
simply adore a chilled Pouilly Fumé.

Thanks for all your brilliant and funny comments regarding
the closing ceremony, I am just madly, truly, deeply heartbroken
that Bowie didn't sing 'Heroes'.

Would've died happy.

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