Today I went out...

...to meet a friend in a cafe I chose.

I knew it might be a bit noisy because it is half term and there are children everywhere, but I had 3 back up places nearby, that might be quieter.

I know I need more practice in noisy situations to learn to hear better with this remapped processor. I know I am probably doing very well all things considered i.e.
1. The expectations for and from a pre-lingually deafened person who has had the cochlear implant in her old age literally. The expectation is generally that this kind of person just gets noise but not speech as such.
2. It is only a few weeks since this extensive re-mapping.

I intend to get everything possible from this new mapping and that includes more from speech, and more from music.

Listening to speech in noisy situations still eludes me. I am totally reliant on lip-reading. It has to be better than this. That is my expectation. There were a lot of noisy children and the processor was picking up their noise and not my friend talking.

So basically I was telling my brain to dampen down the children and other conversations going on around us (not out aloud of course!). My friend went to order our meal. And when she came back and began talking again, I found it easier. My brain wasn't picking up so much as before of the surrounding noises.

If I shut my eyes I knew my friend was talking, but not what she was talking about. That was still a mystery. I still needed to totally lipread to follow what she said.

But this was tons better than a couple of weeks ago when my brain went into meltdown because of the noise of the cafe where we were last at. I had to shut my eyes then when I was talking, because brain was overloaded with all this new input of sound.

So today was an improvement.

Anyway I said cheerio to my friend and went back to my car in the car park. I don't know why but I gave brain instructions to listen specifically for any noise that might be a car starting. Because I have to use my eyes always constantly for any reverse lights that tell me a car is backing out etc.

I had just got to my car and was getting my keys out, when the sound of what I can only describe as someone choking began and then the noise changed. So I looked round and realised a guy two cars away must have just started the engine of his car and he was about to come out forwards.

So that is good I have picked up that.

As yet I have no idea what the noise of a car behind me, in a car park sounds like. I am using my eyes and looking round all the time anyway.

When I got home I thought I was doing well as regards tiredness with all this learning to hear effort, but when I got in, I just about managed to get my shopping perishables into the fridge before I went to bed and crashed out for a couple of hours.

I was still tired when I woke up. Would loved to have stayed asleep, but I still have a painting to do for my challenge to myself of a painting a day every day in 2017.

So put some paper outdoors on the table. No wind today. Watercolours again, like yesterday. Water misters again. Let it dry. So that was the top pic. Then got the Isopropyl alcohol again and sprinkled that on. Let it dry. Then did it a couple more times, and the bottom pic is the final result.

It might not be easy to see on my photo, but it brings out other colours in the colour. For example in a blue which is more the purple end of the spectrum, the Isopropyl brings out the purple in it.

Update: some different grandchildren the other side of me...conversations...can pick up a rhythm of the noise of speech or something. Am sure I heard a child say 'Thank you'. Am sure there is a boy a girl and grandma. Am eavesdropping here. Am sure I am picking up odd words...'now'...'wait'...'be careful now' (that was Grandma!)...'be careful now' (again!)...they said so much for a few minutes and most of it was a blur...

Wow, I have just eavesdropped!!! That was totally unexpected!!!!!!!!!

I was completely relaxed and chilling out on my swing, not trying any effort to listen, and my brain made some sense of a bit of it. I am smiling a big smile :)


[After the remapping of my cochlear processor, I am readjusting to the different sounds, which are actually vastly different, as it is now suggested I was never mapped properly in the first place which is why I have struggled the last few years.]