Hell Without Pain

A writer once described Las Vegas as Hell without physical pain. But for me, after 48 hours the whole scene becomes so overwhelming that I get the wiggles and my repeated itches to get out finally break though my skin. After that, the pain starts to set in. Obviously I use the itch until you bleed expression as a metaphor. But after two nights here, Bonnie and I are at the airport and we cannot wait to board our flight.

To its credit, Las Vegas does some things quite well and it is always extremely predictable right down to the perpetual "90 degree and sunny" weather forecast. It attracts 37 million people a year, an important addition to the US economy even though only 30 percent of those that travel here gamble. Many of the hotels are amongst the most well fitted and professionally staffed in all of the land. And the quality and the quantity of fine dining establishments there is remarkable (if you can ignore the fact that when you are "dining al fresco" that you are dead center in the middle of a million square feet of hardscape). Also, the big-ticket entertainment there is the best of Broadway and Hollywood and Nashville all rolled into one. And if you like people watching, this is your place. But my "likes" list begins to end there.

Many say that it is a place of structural wonder, a victory of engineering and construction techniques. Its physical attribute is impressive but only because it is large. To my eye, the result of these massive buildings are a bastardization of design techniques with no sense of scale or public outdoor space or reference points from one kitschy cultural reference to the next. The pyramids of Egypt are not all that far from a travesty of a rendition of Paris that sits uncomfortably close to Caesar's lair that is just down the street from a deserted pirate's island which is cross-corner from the Wynn, built as an homage to oneself right down to its gilded glass which is the only distinguishable aspect of its design. If you exclude massive and overdone, all of these themed buildings have little in common with one another. While one might think that this leads to an intriguing and eclectic diversity, what it actually renders is a bowl of overly cooked alphabet soup.

And when will people learn that you do not have to try hard to have a good time in Vegas and when you try to0 hard to have a good time that you actually become a form of poor entertainment to others? I watched a couple last night literally bounce off the doors of the hotel rooms of others as the alcohol had stripped them of their ability to walk a straight line. All I could think in the morning is when they will arise and post on their Facebook pages that they had such an AMAZING time last night in Sin City.

And finally there are the slot machines that sit as a strategic maze between the lobby and the lifts that take you to your room. As you travel to your posh hotel room that is elegantly fitted with fine linens and furniture of substance, you are required to weave a path through cigarette smoke filled air complete with excessively intrusive electronic pings and pangs and LED flashes which overwhelm your senses. I have never understood the paradox of traveling to high thread count cotton through a labyrinth of a Coney Island arcade. I dread the path from the world beyond to the comfort of my hotel room.

So with my Vegas-vent now fully behind me, you may ask why I subject myself to this city. I have been here on trips with friends or family where the people matter more than the place and, this place is as amusing as any. But, most of my visits here are not by chance or by choice. Rather, it seems every big conference coordinator in the business world has Vegas in the center of their mind. Oh why oh why is it not New York or LA?

I hope your week is treating you well. I hope to catch up a bit with you all this week. My fall schedule is always so very full. I wish I had more blip time behind the lens and on-line.