Gross

My husband and I are fairly private people - we don't socialise much and, apart from the couples opposite and two doors down, we don't have much to do with the neighbours.

About a month ago we got new next door neighbours - a retired couple. They've taken a couple of parcels in for us over the last month and this, somehow, makes us new best friends. The husband is very keen on huntin' shootin' and fishin'. We didn't realise how keen until his wife appeared on our doorstep this afternoon with five partridges. Not four, as in two brace, but five.

Whole birds, complete with heads, feet and feathers. Perfect in every way except, well, dead.

My husband was raised in a very rural village in Norfolk and reckons he could have a go at plucking one and cooking it but I'm pretty sure I won't be eating any of it. I wonder if the cat would like it?