The Fire Within

There’s a fire within me, a rage that just won’t go away.

All I’ve had this past few days from kidney support groups and nurses is that the life I had prior to CKD has gone.  The sports I used to be able to do, well I’ll probably find new ones now.  That job I loved and enjoyed will have to change to something else.

Why?  Why should I have to give everything up?  I didn’t want this.

And the thing that really kills me is that I can’t do a thing about it.  I’m so devoid of energy, just getting up in the morning is a win.  Although a win it hardly seems like, the monotony continues.

I don’t know what to do.  I don’t know how to get myself out of this. 


I can’t plan for the future, because that future is massively uncertain.