Address to the Bin

Our trusty old kitchen bin gave up on us today after 13 loyal years of
service. Bb's taken it round to our local recycling unit and I decided to
address it. Our new one's the same brand and just as it was getting
wrapped I noticed a few wee scratches on the side and commented on
them. 'I can give you 15% off', said the shop assistant. What is it they say about taking a girl out of Scotland, but not Scotland out of the girl?

Fair fa' your honest, sonsie face,  
Great Chieftain o’ the dustbin-race! 
Aboon them a' ye tak your place, 
Oxo, Swan or Wesco: 
Weel are ye wordy of a grace 
As lang 's my arm. 

The groaning trencher there ye fill, 
Your hurdies like a distant hill, 
Your pedal wad help to mend a mill 
In time o’ need, 
While thro’ your pores the rubbish stays 
 Like amber bead.

Ye Pow'rs wha mak mankind your care, 
And dish them out their bill o’ fare, 
Auld Digitaldaze wants nae stinking ware 
That sticks and creaks; 
But, if ye wish her gratefu’ prayer, 
Gie her a Brabantia!