Marketing genius

Lads, lads. I've got an idea. And a shaggin brilliant one at that if you ask me. Which you haven't.
Yet.

You know the way, like, some people, no matter how much you tell them that something is bad for them, they'll do it all the same? They'll do it even more, even! Just cause some bore in a suit or a lab coat told them that it is bad for them. Which it is.

Well. I am going to apply this concept to advertising.

I've called it the it's-bad-for-them-but-them-fecken-eedjits-will-do-it-anyway-because-they-are-deliberately-being-contrary-them-fecken-eedjits effect.
What do you say Brian? Reverse psychology? What the beep is that? It will never catch.
Let's stick to the it's-bad-for-them-but-them-fecken-eedjits-will-do-it-anyway-because-they-are-deliberately-being-contrary-them-fecken-eedjits effect if you don't mind, because I am the creative director here and it is your turn to go and get the gourmet sandwiches.

Well, we've been asked to shift tons of spray on tan.
Because we've learned from a cousin of Mickey Harney who was drinking with a friend of a junior minister in the Department of Health that they are going to ban sunbeds for good.

Everybody has known for years that they are bad, but sunbeds are the ultimate it's-bad-for-them-but-them-fecken-eedjits-will-do-it-anyway-because-they-are-deliberately-being-contrary-them-fecken-eedjits item.

My big idea is to generate a similar reaction to our product.

Any ideas lads? Come on, let the creative juices flow.
Jaysus, Brian, I did not mean this as a green light to spill your cappuccino all over the gaff.
Come on lads, shoot. Gimme your best.
I can't hear you Eamon. What did you say? "Sun Tart"? Not bad, not bad.
I quite like it. I don't dig it yet, but it's a step in the right direction. I like the tart bit. "Sun" though is not too immediately negatively connotated.
What do you say Mickey? "Burned tart". Yeah... yeah! That's an improvement. But there is no actual burn with the lotion. Not as far as we know anyway.

Hold on second... Lads... I can feel something coming... It's not a real burn, we can't compete with the shaggin sunbeds on that one for the it's-bad-for-them-but-them-fecken-eedjits-will-do-it-anyway-because-they-are-deliberately-being-contrary-them-fecken-eedjits factor.
Our is not even toxic. Well, it has not been proven to be.
Yet.

Ours is fake... It's... tart... dessert... cooking... childhood memories... granny by the stove... buns... bake... burned my hand on the stove... cry... pain... baked buns mean pain...

FAKE BAKE! I've got it.
It's fake, not real, cheap, plastic shite. Fake, fake, fake.

BAKE! not the cakes oh no. Bake your arse. Pain! Childhood pain.

FAKE BAKE! We'll be raking it in lads.
FAKE BAKE! Jeez, I'm a marketing genius...