All that is beautiful

By sharob

Nothing like the stars to put you in your place.

I have quite a story tonight. And I've had a bottle - A BOTTLE - of Amarula. I don't usually drink but I'm feeling rather sad at the moment. My husband doesn't pay me much attention, he's out today and tonight with work. My girls are at Nanas house enjoying themselves and I'm on my own. I don't mind that so much, nice to have some me time. But hubby and I have been having issues for some time now. Wish we'd get out of them. I went to lunch with an old male friend today who admittedly I used to have a crush on. I didn't make *that* much effort, straightened my hair and painted my nails - I always paint my nails so it wasn't special effort. My hubby doesn't trust this guy as I think he bases his standards on his cheating friends. My friend isn't like that .. yeah yeah, don't we all say that but honestly, he has never made a move toward me, never. Tonight, he didn't even compliment me on how I looked. I wanted a confidence boost. That was all. I wasn't out for cheating. I don't want to cheat. I wanted someone to say I looked nice. I wanted someone to appreciate me. I wanted to feel like a woman and not just a mother and housemaid. I wanted to feel attractive. Of course I have the mate who I trust 100% who wouldn't ever say those sorts of things. I wish my hubby knew about that because then I'd be allowed to see him more often and we do have a lot in common.

Anyway, so I came home, spent an hour with LOUD music and blitzed the house, changed all the bedding, tidied the kids rooms and the kitchen, 2 loads of washing etc etc etc .. then I opened a new bottle of Amarula and started on the YouTube music videos and living all my woes on Facebook as you do. Then my neighbour invited me over. I learned Gangnam Style. I danced to it. Badly. I've never heard that song in it's entirety until tonight. Oh my goodness, I'm dooomed. I need to get back to old Tchaikovsky to bring me back to Earth.

But wow, when I stepped out of her house, 30 minutes ago I looked up and gasped at the sky, the beautiful clear sky. Beautiful. In my drunken state, I had to get the camera out, set it up and get this picture. The picture that reminds you that you are but a drop in the ocean, a nothing in this universe. Here we are whizzing around in space completely at the mercy of space crap. This is an 18 second exposure. I counted to 20 but I must have counted too fast. But to capture this. This is amazing. And for my 365, I think, a great picture and story. It's taken me around 2 years to get here as I post far too infrequently.

Soooo all in all, I didn't cheat on my husband, but I know he doesn't 100% trust me. And I realise my place in the order of things.


I feel a little sick.

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