Clinging On

Was so hard when our three granddaughters were brought to say goodbye to their Grandy. 
Because of social distancing  l was in another room and it broke my heart not to be able to give them a hug especially when l heard their tears as they left with Rebecca and Mike.
We had decided a few weeks ago how we would deal with this and we worked out what to do with advice from our palliative care team and doctor.
I wanted the girls to see Mr P before he was administered the syringe driver  which will deliver the drugs he now needs.
That’s been done and now there is no need to give any drugs orally.

Our son Is here right now and sat with his dad downstairs while l am trying to have a sleep upstairs, he will be back tomorrow with his family and again we won’t be able to comfort each other face to face.
It all seems so strange and not how we envisioned this to be when Mr P came out of hospital to spend his last days at home surrounded by his family.
My daughter and her family and my son and his family can’t be together and l can’t be with them.
But they will all see Mr P and he will be all the happier for that.

I am aware that there are so many, right now, across the world that can’t say goodbye to their loved ones and l just can’t imagine that.

My tulips are all but finished but l can’t bear to part with them, not yet.

Thank you for the stars and hearts.