Broken

My internet connection has been flaky for several days down. [A certain ISP] told me on Tuesday night that its engineers are working on some unspecified local glitch. But as recently as this morning it still wasn't working properly, with routine downloads slower than a snail carrying a bag of heavy shopping...grumble grumble. Then I got into work only to find that the office internet have also gone down. I phoned our PR company - their internet had gone down too! Which one of you broke the internet? Come on, own up!
I felt bereft. One day soon I feel sure that a cleaner in some distant data centre will accidentally unplug the central Server of all Servers to do a bit of hoovering in an awkward corner and THE ENTIRE INTERNET will shut down. Going analogue again could prove quite a shock to the system....